Porcelain-Pup

I'm constantly restrained, in how I think and what I say. So what? This isn't new... It's this, unexplained feeling, that leaves me staring at the ceiling... With my head in my hands, and it makes me a monster I cannot stand. When I finally have my say, the words fall out, and I trip, strained. After I get up off the floor, I then think about it some more... What I've just done or said, and what I would have like to have done instead. Thinking like this has left me helpless, and over the last few years I've become less, of who I was and what I did... but now I just feel like a I'm little kid. Lost in the ways of the world, but not its